Debtor, How Big Is Thy Mountain

New total is $15, 832.51. And it's all mine.

As if that weren't depressing enough, Bianca and I were looking through the home listings (we live on the west coast), and I thought it would be fun if we each drank from a mug as we looked at the home prices. Then we could do spit takes at each other.

"Oh, honey, here's a 'charming, fixer-upper 2 bedroom' for only - spppppppppttthththtthththth! - $987,000?! What's it made of, gold?"

Sigh. Something to look forward to once I'm out of debt. Putting myself a different kind of debt.

Woo hoo.

Baby You Can Drive Your Car, With Our Junk On Your Trunk

While we're on the subject of Bianca's car, it reminds me of when we went to purchase it. We bought the car while still living in the Midwest, and this is what car dealers do where we're from: they put a big plastic chrome-y looking name of their dealership on the back of the car. Not a licence plate holder, mind you. Not something you can take off easily. No, this is attached TO the back of your car, to the body. On the paint. Some even use vinyl letters.

What the hell is this all about, may I ask? And what kind of sheep allow this kind of nonsense to go on? Why not tattoo Olaf Dingle's Car Sellery on my arm? Perhaps if you distracted me with a television set in the lobby you could. Perhaps some snacks for further distraction? Pork skins? Sure. Do what you will. Because protesting is too much work. Christ, it's a wonder we have any civil liberties left.

As the negotiations for the car neared the end, Bianca pulled a very Bizarro World move and pointed to the name and said, "I want this taken off." The salesman looked at her like she had suddenly started to vomit kittens, but dutifully sent the car off to have it removed.

Are you driving around advertising? Do you care? Obviously most people don't. Happily where we live now, there is a bit more respect for the customer. Not much, but some.

Getting Held Behind A Couple Of Grades

Bianca will soon be debt free. Which leaves me and my sixteen large. I feel like she's graduating, and moving to another state to attend college, and I'm still a junior in high school. Or, for a truer sense of scale, a sixth grader. Which would be kind of sick if we were dating.

I'm extremely happy for her, but my feelings of being a drag on the relationship is always there. Just another bit of stress to go with the monthly payments.

On the upside, it shifts the spotlight onto me! Poor, pitiful, debt-ridden me!

I wish this sixteen thousand was a person, so I could punch it in the spleen. Instead I'll pull a Corky St. Clair and just go and bite my pillow.

Kwote Korner

"Does the man who makes the shoes own you, clown?
You can't even pry the nameplate off, now can you?
Fix it with your tiny fist there
James Van Der Beek and them sisters from Sister, Sister
The only one that's ever felt this is you
The force that's forcing you
To feel like busting up a Starbucks.

This bitter drink
Has made you drunk
The thoughts you think
Become unthunk"

"Busting Up A Starbucks"
From the album "Haughty Melodic" by Mike Doughty

My Car's Almost Mine!

Made a payment of $1700 on my car yesterday and now the balance is $1618.03. My state income tax is still pending in my checking account and the additional good news is that I sold two paintings over the weekend, so I'll definitely have enough with some left over for a weekend family trip in the late spring. The financing company now says my next payment is $171 and due in November of 2008. I'm planning on paying it off before the end of the month and I'll keep checking my on-line banking to see when the checks clear. It's not even registering with me that I'll be debt-free once this is paid off. And the odometer is 35,600, so I could actually have it paid off before the 36,000 mile warranty expires!

Apparently I Am A Plastic Bag-Refusing Freak

As part of living in "Bizarro World," I've been trying to cut down on the amount of plastic bags we take home from every place.

I have been to the dump, folks, and it is not a pretty place. If you ever want to feel sick to your stomach at the sheer wastefullness of us human animals, take a field trip to your local dump. I remember standing in the sunshine, hand over my mouth in an asinine attempt to stop the stench, and watching hundreds of thousands of plastic bags swirling on the winds among the seagulls. The bags looked like ghosts hovering over a Dante-ish version of trash hell.

So today, fresh off my last post about plastic bags, I went to the mega-grocery store. I had three items: milk, a bag of buns and some not-so-healthy "Texas Crispers" fries. As I set these items down on the little moving belt thing, I immediately said, "I don't need a bag."

Checkout Woman: "You don't want a bag?"

Me: "No. No bag."

Checkout Woman: "But you got milk."

Me: "Yep. I have milk. It's got a handle, see?"

Checkout Woman (to Bag Boy): "This guy doesn't want a bag."

Bag Boy (to Me): "You don't want a bag?"

Me: "NO BAG."

Bag Boy (to no one): "Friday's pay day."

Checkout Woman: "You sure you don't want a bag? You got three items here."

Me: "I would not like my items bagged."

Bag Boy: "You got milk there, though."

At this point I just took my receipt, gathered my three items in my arms, and left. So, if you ever want to know what it's like to be treated like you're developmentally disabled, or have Alzheimer's or like you enjoy putting applesauce in your shoes, deny the bag.

Free Groceries Are A Small But Welcome Victory In A Long And Dirty War

While checking my voicemail at the airport at 4 a.m. this morning I discovered I had won $25 in free groceries from our favorite grocery store, Trader Joe's.

We won the contest that allows you an entry if you bring your own grocery bags into the store. A couple of months ago we purchased three of Trader Joe's handy reuseable bags. Now we take them into the other grocery stores we visit. In our broom closet, there were enough plastic bags to build an entire family of plastic bag people. Since buying the reusable bags we've cut down that amount considerably, and now find ourselves saying "I don't need a bag" at almost every transaction at all the stores we visit. Cashiers look at us as if we recently found a way to get our straight jackets off.

Ikea just announced it will soon begin charging for each plastic bag. Good for them.

Anyway, it was $25 we didn't have to spend this month.

Tax Refund Came Through

Yea! Got a nice surprise when I went on-line to check out the bank account because with our rent going up and some other unexpected expenses, I was unsure if we had enough funds to cover everything. Noticed a huge amount in the checking account and found out my federal income tax refund came through. And just now when I checked to see the actual amount, I found that the state refund came through as well. That's a total of $3563. It's a lot because I only claim myself and my Number Two Son on my W-4 form, but my Number One Son recently moved across the country and is attending college near me, so I got to claim him on my taxes. I know I need to add him to my W-4 so I don't let the government use my money interest-free all year long, but my human resources person is a little scary and you have to approach her when she's in a good mood. I've already asked her once, and reminded her this past Friday. Hopefully by next week I'll get it changed which should help out with the rent increase. This refund is supposed to pay off my car, but I have a rather high credit card bill that includes my broken tooth ($374) and an airplane ticket for my Number Two Son ($279). Plus my Number Three Son is visiting on his spring break this week, so I think I'll leave a little in the checking account for "dining and entertainment". At he's 14, the dining bill could be rather high. Also the state refund is "pending", so I can't really spend it yet. I'll check into how much I actually owe on the car and post after I make a payment.

Kwote Korner

On the continuing subject of feeling trapped, here's a quote that speaks to how many times these traps we find ourselves in are self-made.

"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man' sliving spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun."

Chris McCandless

NCN Update

NCN has kindly added our update! You can see it here.

We've knocked 19% off our debt this year.

I'm thinking of possibly doing the cabbage patch, though Bianca frowns on the practice.

Oh, hell, I'm doing it anyway.